Hell Raiser *1 Boris Yeltsin

Boris Yeltsin. Russian hell raiser and sometime leader of men

Boris Yeltsin, the old Russian leader who often seemed ‘pished as a fart,’ is the subject of this hell-raising tribute. Boris was fun; he had that old uncle vibe who might embarrass you at Christmas, but was endearing nonetheless. Today, Russia has the much scarier Putin, a man who exudes toughness (with arguable homoerotic issues) and is a rather stark contrast to Obama’s ineptitude and classless moments (like that selfie during a commemoration).

Boris Yeltsin, born February 1, 1931, was the first freely elected President of Russia. His political standing soared after he led the protesters against the August 1991 coup attempt to oust Gorbachev. Following the dissolution of the Soviet Union in December 1991, he remained in power as president of the Russian Federation. As a leader, he wasn’t the most effective; he faced criticism for his handling of Chechnya, rampant corruption, and rising prices under his governance, but hey, that’s politics.

But if you asked the average person about Boris, they’d likely remember his legendary, drink-induced antics.

It’s the Way You Tell Them

One of the classic tales is from a state visit to Washington in 1995. Yeltsin got so drunk he was found outside the White House in his underpants, trying to catch a cab for a pizza run. The next night, he was mistaken for a drunken intruder, stumbling around his guest house, trying to get back to bed. Imagine if the Secret Service had taken him out!

Groove Rider

Another memorable Yeltsin moment was in 1994 during a visit to Berlin. Meant to oversee the departure of the last Russian troops from Germany after WWII, Yeltsin, who had been drinking since midday, he found himself conducting a military orchestra where he just couldn’t resist trying to be a conductor, grabbing the baton, dancing like he was in a boy band, and singing as bad.

Then, during a 1997 conference on nuclear weapons in Sweden, Yeltsin kicked off with a champagne lunch. He rambled about Swedish meatballs and how they resembled tennis star Bjorn Borg, all while trying not to fall off the stage during the photo op. He even mistakenly praised Finland, which didn’t go over well with the Swedish hosts. Good man Boris.

Beer and Lots of It

Yeltsin also made headlines with his offhand remarks, such as proclaiming to reduce Russia’s nuclear arsenal by a third without consulting anyone back home, or urging Germany and Japan to dismantle their non-existent nuclear weapons.

In Ireland all the local dignitaries were looking splendid in their shiny suits waiting for the leader of Russia to arrive in Shannon airport. Its not every day the head of such a great nation as Russia comes into town. The plane landed.

And they waited. And waited. And waited a bit more. This went on for a few hours. Then the plane left. This was all carried live on Irish TV, showing Albert Reynolds, head of the Irish government hanging around in the pissing rain, while Boris was on the plane getting pissed. Don’t blame him, made the right choice as well

Legacy of a Booze Hound

Boris Yeltsin passed away at 76 on April 23, 2007, in Moscow. Considering that the average life expectancy for a Russian male at the time was 58, Yeltsin lived a full life. He is remembered not only as the leader who oversaw Russia’s economic and political reforms but also as a larger-than-life figure with a legendary love for the bottle.

We salute you, Boris Yeltsin.